the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
