Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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