I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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