Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
