Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
