that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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