i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
