That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Don't make out with my wife yet
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
