Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
