wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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