I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
