kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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