laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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