I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
