You're so nebulous sometimes
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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