I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize