We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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