The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
