Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize