The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
