I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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