BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
