and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
