better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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