How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
