That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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