Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
