He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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