dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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