How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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