he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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