Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Found your dick twin last night
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
