And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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