i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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