last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
