I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
