JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
if only i could text you this smell
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
