My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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