well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
