she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I smell like Dick and happiness
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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