he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
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