Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I still have a little drunk in my system
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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