her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize