before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
