My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
