You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
