Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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