I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
