I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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