Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
where does the pee come out of this thing
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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