I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
